Request
by eClair23
Summary: Scully asks Mulder to be the donor for her IVF...the events both before and after.
1. Chapter 1

_Viable._ What a week. Yesterday Mulder had revealed that he'd kept a vial of her stolen ova hidden from her for well over a year, and today she'd discovered that against all odds they could very well be viable. After all that was done to her, how could this even be possible? Surely this was a dream. She couldn't decide if she was angry with him or exceedingly grateful. Probably both, if she was being honest.

She felt as if everything had changed for her, and yet nothing was different at all. Sure, she could possibly have children at some point in the future, but there was still the problem of who to have them with. Without a father, she was right where she'd been all along: unable to have a child of her own. Unless she could find someone, as Doctor Parenti had suggested. Or she could use a sperm donor, but she wasn't too fond of that option.

She would have to dip into her savings heavily to be able to afford even one attempt at in-vitro fertilization, and the odds of it taking were not in her favor. Was it even worth it? What if it failed? It would destroy her. She'd already lost one child, she couldn't lose another. What if it took? Would Mulder stick around as her partner? She might have to quit the FBI to become a stay-at-home mother.

Anyone other previously infertile woman would be ecstatic at receiving this news. So why didn't she feel anything? Had she really managed to numb her feelings about the manner so completely in self-defense?

Oh well, she'd have to brush it off before their meeting with the board. The first item of business was to get the X-Files back. After that, she could figure out how to ask him. _Wait, I'm asking him?_ She hadn't even given it a second thought, but her brain instantly locked onto Mulder and refused to let go. But this was a problem for another time. For now, work took precedence over personal life. Besides, she should sit on this decision for a while, make sure she was absolutely positive she could ask this of Mulder.

* * *

Watching Mulder today, and the gentleness with which he treated Gibson when he was sick, really cemented Scully's decision that he would make a good father to a child, should she choose to ask him. Up until now, she'd never really thought of him as a father, but now she couldn't help seeing him in a different light.

* * *

When Gibson had accused her of thinking of him as a lab rat, she had had an extremely vivid vision of what Emily might have one day said to her if she had been allowed to grow up.

For an instant, she had seen her little girl's sweet face, softened by baby fat (she was barely three), tears in her eyes, asking her _why_. Why had she let this happen to her, if she really loved her like she said? Why was she letting these doctors run tests on her daughter if there was nothing wrong?

How could she look Emily straight in the eyes and tell her everything was okay, when her eyes were clearly full of fear? She just wanted her mother's comfort, and Scully couldn't even provide that.

She hit the wall with her fist, willing the guilty tears in her eyes to go away. It wasn't time for this. Wasn't time to be lamenting all that she'd lost when she could still save this little boy.


	2. Chapter 2

She'd thought she was sure about asking him to be her donor. Now, seeing his reaction to her talk of settling down, she was wavering. She had brought up the conversation as an attempt to gauge any thoughts he might have of domesticity, but he had brushed her off so casually that she had to conclude that he was not at all interested. Would she want to have a child if its father refused to settle down and help her raise it? Had she honestly expected Mulder to settle down into domestic bliss and help her raise this child for the next eighteen years, to give up everything he had been striving after for the better part of a decade? To give up the chance to find answers about his sister?

How could she have been so foolish? Wanting to ask a man who spent his whole life running around, never resting, trying to chase a truth shrouded in mystery, to father a child with her? To give up the things he loved just to help her with her own personal issues?

The problem was that she knew that Mulder would do anything to help her. But she didn't want him to do it just to help her out. Reluctant as she was to admit it, she didn't want to raise a child alone. Come to think of it, she didn't want to _be_ alone anymore.

Maybe she was just overreacting, overanalyzing. Knowing Mulder, he was probably just trying to be flippant as a way to conceal his true feelings about the matter. She decided she'd probably be better off sitting him down and having a serious conversation about this at some point soon. Maybe after they got back home from this weird encounter with the police….


	3. Chapter 3

That settled it. It might seem weird to anyone but Dana Scully, but watching her partner bleed out in front of her on repeat for who knows how long made her realize that they might not have all the time in the world. Both of their lives were ticking time bombs, and all she was doing was wasting time by refusing to acknowledge her feelings for him. After the body-swapping episode, she'd filed the idea of asking Mulder to be her sperm donor away in the back of her mind. It just hadn't been the most crucial thing to bring up with everything going on.

But confronting their mortality had cracked the dam. She had made up her mind to ask him. Regardless of how he took it, it was time for her to start taking charge and asking for what she wanted. She was tired of wasting time, tired of rationalizing that there was always something more important going on at the moment than her personal struggles. It was now or never. She decided on now.

That was why she called him that Monday night and asked him to come over, she had something to discuss with him.


	4. Chapter 4

"I just have to figure out how to ask him." That was the understatement of a century. Sure, they were friends, quite possibly best friends who'd been on a couple of dates. And maybe those didn't even technically count as dates.

Yes, they were close, but asking him if he would have a child with her? That seemed a little presumptuous. They had never talked about the exact status of their relationship, but this seemed a poor time to spring this discussion on Mulder. She felt as if she were crossing some unsaid, invisible line. _Hey, Mulder, I know we're work partners or friends or something more, but how do you feel about having a kid with me because I'm running out of time and there's no one else for me to ask?_ She kicked herself mentally. How could she have ever thought that this would be at all appropriate? She wouldn't blame him if she asked him and he turned around and walked out of her life forever. It was a lot to spring on the guy.

She placed the wine glasses carefully on the coffee table in front of her couch. He did like red, right? She tried to remember how she knew that. Had she ever actually _seen_ him drink red wine, or was it just her own personal preference talking? _Don't be stupid,_ she told herself, _the wine's not what you're worried about._

She jumped about a mile high when she heard his soft knock at the door. She opened the door, feigning nonchalance, and welcomed him in.

"You could have just let yourself in, you know."

"I know. But since you asked me to come over, I figured it would be polite to allow the hostess to invite me in." He kissed her cheek, an unusual show of affection.

"We can sit. I poured some wine. Is red okay?" She asked, fidgeting ever so slightly with the leg of her pants.

"Yeah, red's great. Thank you," Mulder grinned, a little uncertain. "Why so nervous, Scully? You invite me over here to try and poison me? I figured once we'd gotten through the first six years we were golden." He chuckled and took a sip of his wine.

She took a deep breath, trying to compose herself. "Actually, Mulder, I asked you over to discuss something of personal interest to me."

He nodded, his expression turning serious. "Okay, shoot."

 _Who are you kidding, Dana, you can't just drop something like this on him!_ "You know what, I'm just being stupid, forget I ever said anything. It's not important."

"Scully, don't lie to me. What did you want to talk to me about? May as well spill, I'm already here." His hand found her shoulder and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Whatever it is, I promise I'm not going to judge you."

"It's not that, Mulder. I'm scared you'll want to leave if I ask you to do this." She wouldn't look at him anymore, instead focusing her stare on the carpet.

"Let me be the judge of that, Scully. I think you forget, I've seen aliens. I'm a big boy, I can take it. What's got your goat?"

She huffed and let her face fall into her hands for a moment. Then she rubbed her forehead as if she had a headache. He panicked for a second, thinking maybe her cancer was back, until he calmed himself down enough to remember that she was okay. She hadn't had a nosebleed in two years.

"Mulder, I, uh, I got a second opinion on the sample of my ova that you recovered two years ago. The doctor that I've been seeing has informed me that they could be viable, but not for much longer. If I want a chance of conceiving a child, now is my only chance. They've offered me genetic counseling if I decide to pursue a sperm donor, but I wanted to talk to you first. I wondered if you might be willing to be my donor." She again fixed her gaze on the floor.

Mulder sat next to her in stunned silence.

"I realize that this is an unexpected request, and I want to give you time to consider. You don't have to give me an answer now, but I do need one soon. It's okay if the answer is no, I'll understand." A tear ran off her nose onto the fabric of the couch.

He nodded faintly. "Can I have tonight to consider?" His voice was little more than a whisper.

"Yeah, yeah, of course. Take all the time you need."

"Thank you," he tenderly brushed his fingers over her hand and left.


	5. Chapter 5

He remembered exactly the way she'd felt in his arms that night. He had thought it would be nerve-wracking to ask Scully to dance, but once she was secure in his arms, he didn't feel scared anymore. They fit together just right, one hand resting on the small of her back, the other holding her hand and gently leading the dance. He'd never liked this song much. Now he wanted it played wherever he went, just to remind him of this moment. He was shocked that she'd taken his hand, surprised that she wanted to dance with him. But she was grinning goofily, ear to ear, and she had been holding out on him-she was a great dancer. He guessed it was the naval upbringing, all the fancy parties and hoopla, but he made a note to himself to ask her about it someday.

Someday. They had come so close to having someday ripped right out of their hands. The cancer was minutes away from taking her precious life, and then… No, he reminded himself, she was in remission, she was okay. He had never thought they would have time to dance together, and now they had all the time in the world. He wanted to dance with her like this again, someday. They could get married and dance at the reception, in front of all their family and friends. She would look radiant, all dressed up in a white dress, her hair and makeup done just so, and she would smile at him, like she had then.

He knew he wanted to marry her without ever going on a single date, but she might take more convincing. He just hoped she'd be okay with playing "Walking in Memphis" as their first dance song. He closed the door behind him.


	6. Chapter 6

Scully kept her gaze on the floor. "Obviously you've had some time to think about my request."

"Um, it's not something that I get asked to do every day. Um, but I am absolutely flattered." She huffed. "No, honestly."

"Okay, if you're trying to politely say 'no', it's okay. I...I understand." She fought to keep the tears out of her voice.

"See, as weird as this sounds, and this sounds really weird, I know, but I just wouldn't want this to come between us." Mulder's eyes sought hers.

She swallowed the lump in her throat, nodding and trying furiously to blink the tears away.

He gently tilted her chin up so he could look her in the eyes. "No, Scully, I'm not saying no at all. What I'm trying to say is that I want to do this right, for once."

"What do you mean?"

He took her hand as he lowered himself to one knee. "If we're doing this, starting a family, having a kid, I think we should do it right. This kid is going to need two parents who are together and who love each other, and I don't know about you, but I think we've waited long enough."

Scully interrupted him, kneeling in front of him and wrapping her arms around his neck numbly. He recovered and placed a hand around her waist. She tightened her hold on him once she got over her shock.

He buried his face in her hair. "Scully, marry me?"

She smiled against his chest. "Yeah."

He pulled away, fumbling with the box as he brought it out of his coat pocket and opened it. He grabbed her hand, silently asking permission. She nodded.

He slipped the ring onto her finger and wrapped his arms tightly around her small frame again, holding her close as he smiled into her hair.

"That's a relief," he breathed.

She pulled back. "Did you really think I would say no?"

He fiddled with his tie. "I was trying not to think about that."

She squeezed his hand reassuringly, pulling his fingers away from his tie as they stood up. "I guess we've got a wedding to plan, then."

Mulder nodded. "And I know this is sort of, um, time sensitive, so we've got to make this quick. I'm happy to do it whenever."

"How's Saturday? The courthouse?"

"Just us?"

"I'd like to have my family there. And I guess we should keep Skinner in the loop, too."

"How much do you think he's going to win once everyone finds out?"

Scully laughed. "If we'd entered the betting pool we could have made a fortune."

"Okay, so your family and Skinner?"

"Do you have anyone you want there?" She looked up at him.

"It'd be fun to have the Gunmen." He chuckled. "Bill's going to kill me, you know."

"Not if I kill him first."

"Saturday, then. I'll take care of everything. Get yourself a nice dress, I'm buying."

"Mulder, you don't have to do that."

"I want to."

She smiled shyly. "And we can see my doctor Monday?"

"Heck of a way to spend the honeymoon, but if you insist…" he feigned disappointment.

"Hey, you knew what you were getting into. You won't get any pity from me. This was your idea, not mine, remember?" She poked him in the side, then her expression turned serious. "When did you get the ring?"

"It was my mother's. She gave it to me a while back, it just took me a while to work up the nerve."

"It's beautiful."

"She really does like you. She'll be honored that you're wearing her ring."

Scully smiled softly. "How did you know my ring size?"

"I have my ways of finding these things out." He tapped his temple.

She wrapped her arms around him. "I really do love you, you know."

He nodded. "I know."

She sighed into his chest. "I guess we need to go ahead and call people. You want to help me tell Mom? I'll handle Bill on my own and you can take the Gunmen."

He let go of her and grabbed the phone as they settled on the couch.

She moved to dial her mother's number, but his hand covered hers. His expression was serious. "You have to help me call Skinner, though."

"Deal."

She anxiously bit her lip as the phone rang. "Mom?"

"Dana! I'm so happy to hear from you. How are you? How is Fox?"

"Actually, Mom, that's what I'm calling to talk to you about. Mulder's here, too."

"Dana, is everything alright?" Her mother's voice was tinged with worry.

Mulder piped in. "Everything's fine, Mrs. Scully."

" _Maggie,_ Fox," her mother corrected.

"Sorry, Maggie."

"Mom, I know this is sort of… out of the blue, but Mulder and I have decided to get married. It's going to be a very small ceremony, just friends and family, at the courthouse on Saturday. I'd love for you to be there." Mulder squeezed her shoulder.

"That's wonderful, Dana, but I wasn't aware that you two were… seeing each other."

"We weren't."

"Would you care to explain a little further, sweetheart?"

"Mom, this is going to sound crazy, but I've recently learned that there is a chance I may be able to conceive a child through in-vitro fertilization using ova that were recovered after my abduction."

"Recovered by whom?"

Mulder cut in. "By me, Maggie."

"And you kept this from my daughter?"

"Yes. I found them during my investigations into a cure for Dana's cancer. I didn't feel that it would be appropriate to put another thing on Dana at that time."

"And you've only just revealed this fact to her, Fox?"

"Yes. I kept them safe in my apartment in my freezer until Dana's cancer went into remission. After the doctors confirmed that she was recovering, I took them to a specialist for evaluation. They deemed them not viable. But I kept them because I couldn't stand to throw them away like they were some kind of worthless trash, not after everything she'd been through. Recently, I've felt that it was wrong for me to continue to keep this from her any longer, so I told her."

Scully jumped back in. "I had them looked at two days ago, and my doctor said there's a slight chance that in-vitro could work for me. So I asked Mulder to be my donor. He wanted to do this the right way, raising a child together, so he asked me to marry him. And I said yes."

"Dana, I won't pretend I understand the way you two have gone about this, but I'm happy for you. I'll be there. And Fox?"

"Yes, Mrs. Scully?" He replied meekly.

"You're going to need to start calling me Mom."

He grinned, his eyes pricking with tears. "Thanks, _Mom._ "

Scully hung up. "That was… more information than I thought I would be sharing. Alright, time for the big guy."

Mulder huffed. "He's going to kill us. Think this goes past 'fraternization in the workplace'?"

She rolled her eyes. "Stop stalling, Mulder."

He punched in Skinner's number.

"Skinner." His voice was brusque.

"Sir, this is Agent Mulder."

"It's late. What do you want, Mulder? Did you just call me up for a nice little chat?" The impatience was obvious in Skinner's voice.

"Fortunately, no. I just wanted to let you know that Scully and I are getting married on Saturday at the courthouse, and you're invited."

There was only silence on the other end of the phone. "Okay, nice talking to you. Bye!" Mulder slammed the phone down as quickly as he could, causing Scully to collapse against him, giggling.

He looked down at her, incredulous. "What?"

"That could not have gone any better. I wish we could've seen the look on his face!" She snorted.

Mulder cracked a smile, then caught a glimpse of his watch. "It's late. I should let you get some sleep." He stood and she stood with him.

"Thank you. For all this. For everything," she looked him squarely in the eyes.

"Easiest decision I've ever made." He kissed her gently and slipped out of the door like it was the most natural thing in the world.


	7. Chapter 7

Scully put the finishing touches on her hair and makeup in the courthouse restroom, admiring the way the short white dress fit her. She was grateful that she had been able to find a dress on such short notice, and pleased with the way it had turned out. The skirt hit right above her knees, and the thick straps were well-suited for the unseasonably warm weather outside. She wore nude pumps and a turquoise bracelet perfect for her "something blue". She fiddled with her hands as she left the bathroom, the nerves hitting her all at once like a fist to the stomach.

She was so distracted that she ran smack dab into Mulder, who was coming out of the men's restroom. He instinctively grabbed her elbows to keep her upright.

"Thank you," she muttered.

"Scully, are you okay? You look upset." His eyes searched hers.

"I'm _fine,_ Mulder."

He led her over to a bench and sat her down. "What's wrong?"

She took a deep breath to try to calm herself. "I know it's stupid, but a bunch of nerves just hit me all at once and I feel sick."

"Stay here, I'm going to go grab you some water."

He returned momentarily, sporting a glass of water he'd found who knows where. "Small sips," he encouraged her.

Once she'd downed about half of the glass, he asked, "Feel better?"

She nodded.

He took her hands in his. "It's not stupid to be nervous. I'm nervous too. It's okay, this is a big deal. Look at me, Dana," he tilted her chin so she was looking at him head on. "Is this still what you want?"

She focused on her breathing, pulling away and looking at her hands. "Mulder, be honest with me. Would you still be doing this if I hadn't asked you to be my donor?"

"Well, it probably would have taken me a lot longer to get up the nerve to ask you, but yeah."

"What if it doesn't work?" He could see the tears threatening to fall from her eyes and rubbed his thumb over her hand soothingly.

"Then we'll get through it together. I'm not going to leave, if that's what you're asking. I'm serious about this."

She cracked a watery smile. "Thank you."

"We can do this. We'll walk in there together, and we'll do this. Does that sound good?"

She nodded.

"You're beautiful, Dana."

She finally looked at him for the first time, _really_ looked. "You look incredible."

They walked into the office, grinning and hand in hand, ready to face the future (or fight it, if need be).


	8. Chapter 8

The reception was a quiet affair in Maggie's kitchen, huddled around her worn kitchen table. Mulder and Skinner helped drag up some extra chairs for the Gunmen and Bill's family.

Maggie made the cake the night before the wedding. It was small, but beautiful. She had diligently frosted the white cake with buttercream frosting in beautiful, intricate patterns. On the top, in blue, she had written, "Congratulations, Dana and Fox" in impeccable penmanship. Scully had been adamant that they didn't really _need_ a cake, given how unorthodox everything else about this marriage was, but her mother had insisted, and she was grateful.

Mulder had found tiny FBI agent figurines who-knows-where and placed them on the top of the cake, holding hands as if at the altar. This made Scully chuckle.

"I was thinking we could keep them on the mantle at your place." She couldn't tell if he was joking or not, but she guessed he was serious. They could argue about it later. After all, they had the rest of their lives.

The cake proved to be delicious. Maggie asked Scully and Mulder to take the quintessential "feeding-each-other-the-cake" picture, and they obliged. Mulder smeared frosting on her nose, catching her off-guard but making her smile and retaliate with a handful of frosting to the face.

Frohike popped the bottle of champagne open and poured the adults a generous glass. "To Mulder and Scully! We all knew it had to happen eventually." Skinner and the other Gunmen laughed.

They eventually shifted to the living room to sit on the couches and converse.

They had their first (and only) dance to "Walking in Memphis", a surprise that Mulder had arranged for Scully and set up with the Gunmens' help. She smiled shyly when she realized just why. The only other time they'd danced together like this had been at the Cher concert with the Great Mutato just over a year ago. Mulder held her close as she rested her head on his shoulder, breathing in his scent. Dancing in front of people had always made her self-conscious, but feeling him breathing so close to her calmed her anxious nerves.

"How did you get to be such a great dancer?"

She considered brushing off his compliment, but figured she should start getting better at accepting his compliments since they were committed to each other for the rest of their lives now. "Thank you. Ahab was in the Navy, so we grew up going to a lot of formal events where they had dancing. You either learned fast or you embarrassed the family. I chose to learn fast, I guess."

"We should dance more often."

"Okay."

"I meant what I said, you know. All the vows and everything. 'In sickness and in health'." A tear slid down his cheek as he remembered the reality that was theirs not too long ago; her pale and dying in a hospital bed, him crying and desperate for a cure.

She tenderly wiped away the tear. "I think we made that particular vow a long time ago, Mulder."

He held her closer. "We sure did. Have I told you how thankful I am that you're here with me, right now?"

She nodded. "I'm glad I'm still here, too. I wouldn't have wanted to miss this."

"Is this how you pictured your wedding, when you were younger?"

"Married at the courthouse and dancing in my mother's living room? Truthfully, no. I always figured I would get married in some fancy church ceremony. But I wouldn't trade this for anything. What about you?"

"Honestly, I never pictured my own wedding. Not even when I was seeing Diana or Phoebe. I figured I wasn't the settling down type. I never thought I'd want a wife or a family, but you changed all that, Dana." He kissed her softly. "You changed everything."


	9. Chapter 9

Day One-Arcadia Falls

Well, this was ironic. Less than a week since she and Mulder had _actually_ gotten married, and Skinner was sending them undercover as a married couple. Skinner had been apologetic, at least, but Scully couldn't help thinking that this case could not have come at a worse time. She and Mulder were still trying to sort out their living situation. She was _supposed_ to be taking it easy in preparation for the embryo transfer appointment next week. Things were complicated, to say the least.

Despite having technically been married for nearly a week, this would be the first time she and Mulder shared a living space. She'd really hoped they could make that transition on their own time and terms, but the Bureau clearly had other ideas.

Since most of the Bureau remained blissfully unaware that they were married, they had needed to rent rings to complete the perfect portrait of domesticity while undercover.

She smiled to herself. When they came home, they'd get to wear their real rings again. She missed the already-familiar weight of her engagement ring and now, wedding ring, on her left hand. "Laura Petrie" had a much gaudier idea of what an engagement ring should be, and the cover ring felt too flashy and too heavy, a constant reminder of the weight this case carried for the future of the X-Files division.

Back to the present. Mulder patted the bed. "Come on, Laura. We're married now."

Scully shook her head vehemently. "If I recall correctly, this whole marriage thing was your idea, not mine, _Mulder_."

He stuck his bottom lip out in a pout.

"We are not having this discussion right now, Mulder. I'm tired and I'm _supposed_ to be resting, remember? We can discuss sleeping arrangements when we get back home, okay? I'm too tired to do this right now."

He scooted out of bed and shuffled toward the living room. "Message received, loud and clear. I'll take the couch. Let me know if you need anything."

"Thank you." She eased herself onto the bed, tugging the comforter around herself and dropping quickly off to sleep, soothed by the sound of Mulder's even breathing drifting through the open door.


	10. Chapter 10

Day Two-Arcadia Falls

Scully had been irritable from the minute they'd closed the front door, smiling and waving. Sure, some of it was likely a result of his off-color comments, he'd allow her that, but he couldn't help feeling that something else was wrong. Maybe she was just tired. It _had_ been a whirlwind couple of weeks, with her asking him to be her donor, his proposal, and the wedding. He knocked softly on the bedroom door.

"Scully?"

She sighed. "Come in."

He sat gingerly beside her on the bed. "What's bothering you? You haven't been acting like yourself." He began massaging her shoulders. "You're really tense. Is everything okay?"

She closed her eyes, leaning into his touch. "Everything just feels like a lot to handle. It seems like we've been scrambling to get our lives in order."

He nodded. "I feel the same way."

"Really?"

"Really. With all the things we've been doing together, we haven't spent any real time together."

"Exactly. This is the worst possible time for an assignment. Doctor Parenti said I was supposed to take it easy before the transfer appointment and since we got here I've done nothing but stress. What if I'm ruining any chance of success here?"

She rubbed her face with her hands, willing herself not to cry.

Mulder pulled her against his side, kissing the top of her head. "Scully. _Dana,_ this is going to work. You've been through so much, it's about time you got a miracle. All we can do is pray and hope for the best, right?"

She leaned her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes. "Can we do that? Can you pray with me?"

He nodded.


	11. Chapter 11

The transfer appointment had gone smoothly, but being on bedrest for 48 hours was driving Scully crazy. Typically most people would only take a day, at most, but Doctor Parenti had insisted on two due to her "sensitive situation". 24 hours in and Mulder had already hand-cooked three meals and eaten beside her in bed to keep her company. She was grateful for his presence and attentiveness, but she felt a little stifled. However, she had to admit that she was enjoying living together. But they still hadn't worked out their permanent living arrangements. She figured he'd just go back to his apartment once she was self-sufficient again. She would miss him.

"Can we at least move to the couch? I need a change of scenery." She stuck her bottom lip out in a dramatic pout.

He looked her over. "Fine. But you've got to take it easy when we're out there, okay? Keep the fidgeting to a minimum."

She rolled her eyes. "I know. You don't have to baby me, Mulder."

He held up his hands in mock surrender. "I'm not trying to. Just trying to take care of you."

She sighed. "I know. And I appreciate it, I really do."

She padded over to the couch with him and settled herself against the cushions. Mulder pulled a blanket over both of them as he put his arm around her waist and held her close. He flipped the television on to a mindless sitcom. Both of them needed something to drive out the silence.

Finally, though, Mulder broke the silence.

"Scully?"

"Hmm?"

"How would you feel about actually living together?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean maybe I start living here instead of my apartment. I know we hadn't talked about it with the wedding and all the chaos, but since we have some down time, I feel like maybe we should discuss it now."

She interlaced their fingers. "I guess you're right. And we're officially married now, so I don't see a reason not to. Especially if the treatment works, it might be more convenient to be living together."

"I thought we agreed that this was a real marriage, not just a convenience thing," he said softly, the hurt evident in his voice.

Her eyes widened slightly. "I thought you were just saying that to make me feel better."

He looked her in the eyes. "I'm dead serious, Dana. I went into this with the full intent of being your husband, and of you being my wife, if you'll have me. Is that still what you want?"

Scully nodded silently.

"Then it's okay if I move in?"

"Yes."

He gave her a squeeze. "Are you feeling okay?"

"Still a little woozy and nauseous, but otherwise okay."

"You want a hot water bottle for your stomach? Maybe some soup?"

She smiled gratefully. "That would be great."


	12. Chapter 12

As his arm wrapped around her waist, pulling her close, she said softly, "What if it doesn't work?"

He kissed the back of her neck. "It'll be okay. We'll figure something else out. Or we can try again if you want." He gave her a squeeze.

He felt her sigh. "I can't afford to do this again, Mulder."

"Then we'll dip into my inheritance."

She shifted to face him. "I can't ask you to do that."

He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "You didn't. And besides, we're married now. What's mine is yours, okay?"

She managed a small smile. "Okay."

"But don't give up hope of this round working just yet. We won't know anything until we see Doctor Parenti next week, so let's try to keep our minds off of it, okay? We've got some filing to catch up on anyway, so that'll keep us both out of harm's way for the time being."

She hummed quietly. "We'd better get to sleep then. Early morning tomorrow. Good night, Mulder."

"Good night, sweetheart. I love you."

"Love you," she murmured sleepily.


	13. Chapter 13

Scully couldn't stop the assault hammering against her mind. She had put herself in harm's way, knowing full well she was risking not just one life, but two. Everything had looked fine according to the paramedics at Mulder's apartment, but they still had to see Doctor Parenti next week to find out if the embryo had taken. The thought made her feel sick to her stomach. What if it didn't take? What if it _did?_

For now, Mulder reminded her to just keep breathing and try to relax. They'd been working on moving his stuff over to her place for the past few days, splitting time between their two apartments until everything was more permanently settled. Her place during the week, his on weekends. Just until his lease was up. Tonight was supposed to be his place, but after everything that had happened, both of them were anxious to go back to her place.

"Do you want to go home?" Mulder asked quietly, stroking her hair.

Scully nodded against his chest.

"I just want to change."

He pulled away so he could look her in the eyes, hands on her shoulders. "Let's go. I'll drive." He held his hand out to her wordlessly.

She opened her mouth as if to protest, thought better of it, and took his proffered hand gratefully, following him to the car.

* * *

As he drove, she stared out the front window at the road speeding past in silence. She was out of it, he could tell. Shock did that to you. Heck, he'd acted the same way after Samantha was taken.

"Dana," he murmured, trying not to startle her.

She jumped anyway, then tried to compose herself, shifting in the passenger seat. Her eyes were wide, as if she was seeing him for the first time.

"Tough day, huh?" He tried to smile.

"Would have been a whole lot tougher if you hadn't come after me," she admitted. "Thank you."

"I'm just glad you're okay, Scully. You had me going there for a minute."

* * *

They pulled up to her apartment and he opened the car door for her. She tried to push it open herself, but she couldn't get her limbs to cooperate. He gently placed his hand on the small of her back and escorted her inside to her couch.

"I'll only be a minute, I want to shower and change into something that isn't covered in blood," she shuddered. "And I guess I need to bandage myself up, too."

"You need any help?"

"I've got it, thank you. Can you get the aspirin out of my cabinet? It's the far right one in the kitchen."

He nodded. "I remember. I'll be out here if you need anything. We can watch a movie if you want, after?"

She looked relieved. "Yeah, okay. You can pick." She pointed to her television cabinet.

* * *

She emerged a twenty minutes later, clad in dark purple satin pyjamas with her hair twisted up in a towel. Mulder triumphantly waved a video tape in the air.

She cocked an eyebrow. "Mrs. Doubtfire?"

"This okay? I figured a comedy might help take your mind off things."

She grinned. "Perfect."

"I double-checked all the windows and doors, by the way. All locked. We're safe in here."

"Thanks, Mulder."

"Can I use your shower?"

"Yeah, of course. What's mine is yours, remember?"

"I'll be out in a minute...oh, I made you some tea, by the way. Chamomile, to help calm you down. It's on the counter."

He left the door cracked in case she needed anything and she reached for the tea. The warm mug felt good on her hands and she smiled as she took a sip. A little bit of honey, just the way she liked it.

* * *

Mulder came back only a few minutes later, toweling off his hair. It felt good to be in clean clothes, like the events of tonight somehow couldn't touch them anymore.

"Thank you for the tea, Mulder. It was perfect."

He grinned as he pushed the tape into the VCR player and settled on her couch. She scooted over closer to him. He stretched his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close as she snuggled into his side gratefully.

He dropped a kiss to the crown of her hair as the end credits rolled and found that she was almost asleep, breathing deeply and, finally, relaxed. "Scully?"

"Hm?" She hummed contentedly.

"You wanna get up and go to bed?"

She nodded sleepily into his chest and stood up slowly. She padded into the bedroom and he followed.

She slid into bed, barely able to get to her side of the bed before she closed her eyes. "Good night, Mulder."

"Sweet dreams, Dana." He slung his arm over her waist.

As he closed his eyes, his mind wandered to how he'd found her today: motionless on the ground, covered in her own blood. He'd nearly jumped out of his skin when she screamed. The thought made him nauseous. He could have lost her. They could have lost the baby. He was a split second away from having to request an autopsy on the one person he could never live without. But she was okay, he reminded himself. She was alive, and fast asleep, finally peaceful.

* * *

She awoke with a scream. She could still feel the ghost of fingers digging into her skin, and she barely made it to the bathroom before she retched violently, remembering the sight of her own blood covering her shirt. She rubbed her sore chest and leaned her forehead on the cool porcelain of the toilet.

A sense of shame threatened to overwhelm her. It hadn't been the hooded figure touching her. It was just Mulder holding her while they slept, which was not a new occurrence, so why had she immediately assumed the one touching her was someone who wanted to hurt her? They'd been married for two months now, partners for nearly six years, and she still couldn't convince her brain he was safe?

She heard a soft rap on the bathroom door. "Scully, it's me. Can I come in?"

"I'm fine, Mulder," she called back. "Go back to sleep."

"I'm coming in. Are you decent?"

She sighed. "Yes."

The knob turned and suddenly, he was by her side, helping her up and rubbing her back soothingly.

"Did you get sick?"

She nodded hesitantly. "I'm really fine. I just had a bad dream, I promise."

"Be that as it may, you seem pretty freaked out," He handed her the toothbrush and squeezed a little toothpaste on it. "You'll feel better after you brush your teeth. Wash up, then we'll talk."

She huffed, exasperated, but obeyed. She did feel better after brushing her teeth, she had to admit. He was right, for once. Well, that wasn't fair. He was right more often than she'd care to admit.

Once they were settled back in bed, he spoke quietly. "Were you dreaming about what happened today?" He yanked the comforter back over them, pulling her closer.

She stared at her hands, speaking sheepishly. "Yeah. I can't seem to shake the feeling. I keep feeling his hands on me, trying to get my heart. I woke up and I thought...you were _him._ " She shuddered.

He gently stroked her side. "Was I hurting you?"

She shook her head. "No. My stupid brain just won't shut up. I mean logically I know you would never hurt me, but my subconscious doesn't seem to agree with me. Mulder, I'm so sorry."

He kissed the back of her neck. "It's okay. It's not your fault, sweetheart. Is this okay right now? That I'm holding you?"

She nodded. "If that book hadn't gotten burned when it did… And what about the baby? What if the baby got hurt? I know they said everything looked okay, but that seems too good to be true." She shivered.

He pulled her close. "But it did. It's okay, Dana. You have every right to be scared, what with the day you've had. But I promise you that you are safe now. We're home and we're okay. And we'll worry about everything in the morning, okay? Let's sleep now."

She nodded hesitantly, then snuggled against him. He wrapped his arms around her tighter in a strong embrace. "I've got you."

"Thank you."

"Always, Scully."


	14. Chapter 14

_It didn't take._ The words rang ceaselessly in her head, making her feel dizzy and sick to her stomach. And finding out wasn't even the worst part. She had to go home and look Mulder in the eye and tell him how much of a failure she truly was. Why had she insisted on coming alone today? If he'd come with her, he would know by now. He might be gone by now.

Would he leave? Would he shove down his own grief and disappointment to be there for her? Would he break down, leaving her to be the comforter? Either way, this would end in someone's tears, she just knew it. It was inevitable.

She'd lost a lot of blood last week after her encounter with Padgett and his murderer. Had that been the final straw, the thing that ultimately killed any hope of a miracle? Would things have turned out differently if she had just kept out of harm's way, as Mulder and her mother had been pushing her to do? Maybe then she'd be going home to deliver good, no, the _best_ , news possible. There would be tears, but they would be tears of joy and laughter as they threw their heads back and laughed at the sheer miracle of it all.

 _But,_ she reminded herself, _no matter the cause, you do not have a baby. You are going home and you have to tell Mulder and this will break both of you._


	15. Chapter 15

Scully fought to maintain what little composure she had left as she quietly pushed her door open. Mulder sprang up from the couch when he heard her footsteps.

"Sorry, I must've fallen asleep."

She attempted a smile, but she must have failed pretty miserably, because he read her like a book.

"It didn't take, did it?" It was a statement, not a question, and he looked at her sadly.

"I guess it was too much to hope for," her voice broke.

He pulled her closer to him, rubbing circles on her back. "It's not your fault, Dana. We can try again."

"Mulder, I'm not strong enough to go through this again."

"You're the strongest person I know, Scully. But this is your decision."

She sobbed into his shoulder. "It was my last chance."

He gave her shoulders one last squeeze, pulled back, and tenderly pressed his lips to her forehead. She shuddered as she exhaled.

He looked her straight in the eyes. "Never give up on a miracle."

"I need to sit down," she breathed.

He steered her toward the couch with a light touch to the small of her back. As she curled up and tucked her legs under her, Mulder yanked a blanket over her and brushed her hand with his fingers delicately. "Be right back."

She flipped on the television while she waited, trying desperately to fill the silence she felt threatening to crush her. Thankfully, Mulder soon returned with a steaming bowl of chicken noodle soup and a glass of water. "I don't know if you're hungry or not… I already ate."

She sighed. "Mulder, you don't have to stay. You can go home. I won't hold it against you. The whole reason we got married was conditional on this working, and since that circumstance is clearly no longer… relevant…" She picked at a loose thread in the blanket.

He put a hand on her knee. "Scully, this marriage thing was my idea, you and I both know that. You need to realize that I meant those vows. I didn't just marry you to be the father of your child. I want to be your husband, if you still want that. I want to stay, if you'll have me. For worse or for better. This just happens to be one of the worst moments."

Tears were beginning to pool in her eyes, and his final statement broke the dam. He looped his arm around her shoulder and tugged her to him as she wept. He tenderly stroked her hair as she shook with emotion. Finally, she cried herself out and pulled away, only to be pulled back again when his lips caught hers.

As they pulled apart, she whispered, "I want you to stay."

He laced their fingers together, lightly touching the rings on Scully's left hand. "I'm here."

He held her close that night as they slept, silently praying that she would find peace; not now, but maybe someday.


	16. Chapter 16

Scully's phone rang and Mulder picked it up. "Hey, Mrs. Scully."

"Hello, Fox. Is Dana there?"

"She's still asleep. Do you want me to wake her?"

"It's not like Dana to sleep so late. Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, it's just…" he sighed, "it's been a long week."

"I was just calling to invite you two to go to mass with me tomorrow morning and then come over for lunch if you don't already have plans."

"Okay, Mrs. Scully. I'll tell her. Take care."

Scully padded into the living room, eyes blurry with sleep. "How long have you been up?"

"Not that long. Your mom called. She wants us to go to mass with her tomorrow."

"Okay."

"She said she's making lunch, too. Do you feel up to that?"

"I guess I'd better be. Sooner rather than later, right?"

"It's okay if you're not. We can come up with something to tell her."

"It'll be fine, Mulder. It's just my mom. And church might be a good place for us to be right now."

He kissed her temple. "Okay. I'm going to head into work, okay?"

"I'll be in a little later. I want to take a shower and eat something first."

"See you in a little while, then. I love you." He closed the door quietly behind him.


	17. Chapter 17

He slammed her ice cream down on the newspaper and she grimaced. "Mulder-" she giggled.

She was overcompensating. He could see it. The Scully he was seeing right now wasn't the Scully he'd held last night as she cried in her sleep. She wasn't really happy, and he knew it. Neither one of them was.

"Go home."

"Excuse me?"

"Go home, Scully. It's Saturday, you don't even have to be here."

"I'm _fine,_ Mulder."

"I think we both need some time to process alone. So you go home and relax a little bit, let yourself feel everything you haven't let out, and I'll try to do the same here. I need something to focus on."

She sighed. "Thank you." She kissed him on the cheek, giving his shoulder a squeeze.

He caught her hand. "Meet me at the baseball field at seven. I'll have a surprise waiting."

"It's a date."

* * *

Scully ran herself a hot bath and read for a while, then dressed herself comfortably for their date in jeans and a sweater. She managed to cook some dinner for herself, but she found herself bursting into tears over her plate of spaghetti. She abandoned dinner and rifled through their dresser, pulling on Mulder's Knicks sweatshirt before curling up in their bed.

She was so tired of crying, but she found it almost impossible to stop. Everytime she thought she had calmed down enough to finish getting ready, grief hit her full-force again and she gasped for breath, frantically breathing in Mulder's scent around her in an attempt to calm down.

When she didn't show up at seven, he started to worry and drove home to her apartment to make sure she was okay. He quietly unlocked the door and scanned the small living space, not seeing her in the living room or the kitchen, and progressively panicking with each room he found empty. He pushed the bedroom door open and found her curled into a tiny ball on her side, shaking. He wordlessly toed off his shoes and curled around her, holding her close as she cried for what felt like the millionth time in the past two days.

"This is my fault."

"What?" Mulder pulled his hand away from hers.

"I can't pretend it's not, Mulder. I'm the side of this equation that isn't adding up. I'm the failure here."

He stroked her hair, gently running his fingers through it in a way he hoped was soothing. "Okay. Maybe your body is the issue here, I'll give you that. But I knew that going into all this. I still chose you. I still choose you even now when it hurts like this. You are not to blame for your body's reaction to all this. The people who took you and manipulated your body are to blame."

She nodded reluctantly, willing herself to believe his words. "Thank you."

"That's what I'm here for." He gave her hand a squeeze.

"I'm sorry, Mulder. I know how much you wanted this," she said quietly.

She felt him suck in a breath and bury his face in her shoulder as he finally broke down. She stroked his arm as he sobbed, assuming the role of comforter.

At some point, they'd both cried themselves out for the time being. They prepared for their date quietly and left the apartment hand in hand.

* * *

Now that she thought about it, this was actually their first date. She chuckled. They were married now, never having gone on a single date. She supposed there had never been much conventionality in their relationship, but she was deeply grateful for it nonetheless.

Rationally, she knew this was just an attempt to cheer her up, but she had to admit that it felt nice to focus on something positive, even if only for a precious few moments. It was nice for both of them to relish in a few stolen minutes of happiness in the midst of their darkness and brokenheartedness. He even managed to make her smile, and more incredibly, to laugh. If anyone had told her a week ago that she would be smiling again despite her heartbreak, she wouldn't have believed them. But here they were, and he was smiling, and so was she.

Things weren't okay, but they would be someday. And for now, they would steal whatever moments of happiness they could, searching for glimpses of light in the darkness.

* * *

As they lay in bed later that night, they became much more somber. Their minds wouldn't stop whirring. Mulder gently placed a kiss to the back of her neck.

"Penny for your thoughts."

She just sighed in response.

"You aren't acting like yourself."

She took a deep breath. "I guess I'm just...a little overwhelmed."

"A little?"

"Fine, a _lot_ overwhelmed." She let out a shaky laugh. "Everything's happened so fast, and _so much_ has happened. I feel like I'm wound so tight I'll explode the next time someone touches me."

He poked her in the side teasingly, then laced their hands together. "You didn't explode."

She rolled her eyes. "You know what I meant."

He nodded. "Do you want me to move out for a while, give you some space? Are we moving too fast?"

She shook her head. "It's not you overwhelming me, Mulder. I'll be okay, I just need time to process everything that's happened."

"Then let's take some time off. We've both got plenty of vacation days saved up. We'll go somewhere, just the two of us. We can let Skinner know on Monday and maybe go the next week. It'll be like a belated honeymoon. Maybe it'll help get our minds off of everything if we can just focus on being together. Not thinking about kids or IVF or anything, just learning how to be you and me."

"Where are we going?"

"Wherever you want."

"Let's go to Cape Cod. We can rent out a cottage, go for walks on the beach…" She hummed contentedly.

"I'll make the calls first thing Monday morning."

She snuggled closer to him. "Goodnight, Mulder. I love you."

"Love you more," he murmured sleepily against the back of her neck.


	18. Chapter 18

They hadn't fallen asleep until well after midnight the night before, and waking up at seven for mass with Maggie Scully was brutal.

Scully tried to cover up the redness and swelling of her eyes as she put her makeup on. Mulder made them both toast and bacon, and the smell of fresh coffee lured her into the kitchen. He placed the coffee mug in her hands and a plate full of steaming food in front of her. She smiled gratefully.

He came back a few minutes later, dressed in a suit and tie. "Is this formal enough?"

She nodded. "Let me get dressed and I'll be ready to go. Mind if I drive?"

"Sure." She only drove when she was upset and trying to take her mind off of things.

* * *

When they arrived, Scully quickly found and greeted her mother.

Her mother knew something was off, but decided not to mention it for the time being. They both seemed… subdued. Dana had been crying, and she suspected that Fox had too. But they would tell her when they were ready. She hoped.

The service went off without a hitch, and they drove back to Maggie's house for lunch. As they walked in, Scully swiped under her eyes to make sure it wasn't obvious she'd been crying. She smelled casserole, one of her favorite dishes of her mother's. Mulder's hand on the small of her back was a quiet reassurance that they could get through something as normal as Sunday lunch.

They all sat down at the table with generous helpings on their plates, prayed, and dug in. Scully wasn't hungry, in fact she felt nauseous, but Mulder was starving.

"So, Dana, Fox, how is married life treating you two?" Maggie broke the silence.

"Oh, um, it's… good. We're still trying to move everything from my apartment to Dana's apartment, but we'll get it done eventually." Mulder offered.

"Dana, you haven't eaten any of your casserole. Is something wrong with it?"

"I'm sorry, I'm just not very hungry."

"What's going on, you two? You look like you haven't been sleeping well."

Scully sighed and Mulder moved his hand to cover hers.

"We found out on Friday that, um… that the in-vitro failed."

He squeezed her hand, looking at her sadly. "It's been a tough weekend."

Mrs. Scully was between them now, pulling them out of their chairs and into a tight embrace. "I'm so sorry."

Scully tried for a rueful smile. "Thanks, Mom."

"Is there anything I can do?"

"I don't think so. We're just still trying to process everything at this point."

"Of course. You two go on home. You need some time alone right now. I'll send the rest of the casserole home with you. That'll be good reheated for dinner if you get hungry, Dana. You go on home and rest, and I'll be here if you need anything or just need a shoulder to cry on." She rubbed their backs as they stepped away from her embrace.

"Thanks, Mom. I love you."

"I love you, sweetheart. I'm just a phone call away."

* * *

To make up for ruining her "ice cream" the other day, Mulder swung by the grocery store on the way home from Maggie's.

"You can wait in the car if you want, this won't take long."

Scully smiled gratefully. She'd been crying most of the way home and was not too keen on being seen in public right about now.

He returned shortly, brandishing a plastic bag containing two quart-size containers of ice cream: chocolate cherry, his favorite, and brownie, her favorite. She rarely allowed herself to indulge like this, but he figured it was a stay-in kind of day.

When they got home, they both changed into their pyjamas and stayed in bed eating ice cream and watching old movies for the rest of the day. She fell asleep with her head on his shoulder and he pulled her close as he fell asleep, too.

* * *

The next morning, they had a meeting with Skinner.

"Off the record, how's it going, you two? You seem… down. Is everything okay?" His voice softened. Despite the tough exterior he kept up when dealing with them professionally, he genuinely cared for both of them.

Scully took a deep breath, but Mulder patted her hand, letting her know that he would take care of this.

"Actually, we wanted to talk to you about that. We, um, we received some bad news on Friday. We were wondering if we could take next week off. We can work through the end of this week, but we were hoping to get away for a few days."

Skinner nodded, quietly wondering what had them so down, but not wanting to ask.

Scully stared at her hands in her lap as she spoke. "We were attempting to conceive using in-vitro fertilization, and on Friday, we were told that it had failed."

Skinner's eyes widened. "I had no idea. I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do?"

She shook her head. "I think the best thing for us would be to get away for a little while."

"Take all the time you need."


	19. Chapter 19

The countdown hit zero. Happy New Year. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Mulder leaning toward her for a kiss.

Until this moment, their relationship and all related displays of affection had taken place behind closed doors in an effort to preserve their work partnership. Besides the self-preservation instincts involved, Scully also tended to be uncomfortable with public displays of affection. It had taken a while for her to get comfortable with even private displays of affection with Mulder, and she still felt paranoid about even holding his hand in public for fear of who might see.

But she felt bold tonight, so she turned toward him, giving him full permission to kiss her here, now, in this hospital waiting room full of other people. She was tired of hiding.

It was gentle and chaste, and yet she still felt vulnerable and exposed. Not with him, of course, but in front of all these people who could turn and see at any moment. She felt reassured when he looked at her afterward, however.

"The world didn't end," he said quietly. _Our world didn't end, just because we made it public. We're still good. Here, we're just a man and a woman who love each other and wanted to kiss each other on New Years'._

She had to agree. "No, it didn't." She blushed slightly as he slung his arm around her shoulder and she leaned into him on the way out to the car. This was nice, she decided. Not in front of coworkers, or even often, but right now, it was nice. She had enjoyed getting to simply be a couple in love for a few minutes. And so had he.


	20. Chapter 20

Why did he agree to this? What in the name of everything good had made him think a movie about their lives would be _such_ a fantastic idea?

He was paying for it now, though. "Mulder" and "Scully" were valiantly declaring their love for one another on screen and making out, in front of every single person in this theater. He was mortified, and he knew Scully was, too. He snuck a look at her face, equally as horrified as his own, and buried his face in his hands.

They were both extremely private people when it came to their relationship, Scully especially. Now, seeing their relationship reduced to a cheap confession of love onscreen, was embarrassing, to say the least. Scully looked like she might cry.

At least Skinner seemed to be enjoying himself. Of course, he had been witness to their marriage and been kind enough to keep it under wraps, but he was getting a kick out of the movie. He kept making faces at them, acting as if he was in on some secret and just having a ball in general.

Mulder couldn't take it. He stormed out of the theater, leaving Scully confused but still in her seat.

* * *

She came out to find him after the movie ended. "I've been looking for you."

He huffed. "They got it so wrong, Scully."

"I know they did. Why are you letting it get to you like this?"

"They made us seem so cheap, so… shallow. It seemed so glib and meaningless, and that's not how I see our relationship. Not at all."

"Mulder, this movie was written by people who have known us all of a year and a half, and even then, they only know the professional side of us. They have no idea of what you and I have been through together in just the last year. They don't know we've been married over half the time they've known us, they don't know we're living together, they don't know about the IVF. They don't know about any of the things that have actually brought us to where we are, at this moment. If I'm honest, I'd rather they didn't know any of those things. I think it's better this way. We can play it off as a joke."

"But it's not a joke."

"You and I know that, and that's enough."

He laced their fingers together. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Now I hope you're in the mood to spend a bunch of money. Skinner was so tickled with the movie that he has given us a Bureau credit card to use for the evening."

His eyes lit up. "Really?"

She nodded. "Yup."

"In that case, what say you we use the Bureau card and go on a little date, Honeybunch?" Mulder wiggled his eyebrows and she giggled. He fished their rings out of his jacket pocket and handed hers to her as he slipped his on.

"Where are you taking me, Poopyhead?"

"The nicest place we can find. You deserve a nice dinner after all the crap that's happened to you, to both of us lately. And we'll order whatever we want to eat. Maybe even go dancing after."

She sighed contentedly. "Sounds perfect."

He stood and helped her up, and they walked off hand in hand, with a skip in their steps.


	21. Chapter 21

"Mulder?"

He pushed open the bathroom door to see Scully leaning heavily on her elbows over the sink. He pulled her up, hands firm under her arms, and guided her to the bed.

"What happened, sweetheart?"

"I, um, I was getting ready for bed and I got really dizzy all of a sudden, vertigo or something. I had to grab the sink for balance."

"Did you hit your head?" His fingers deftly probed her scalp for injury.

"No."

"How are you feeling now?"

"The world won't stop spinning and I've got chills. I can't seem to get warm."

He eased her onto her side on the pillows, tossing her shoes into the corner. He pulled the comforter up to her chin and snuggled close to her, covering her left hand with his and lining up their wedding bands.

"It seems a little silly to keep getting separate rooms since we only ever use one."

"You know, I actually suggested we start sharing a room to the budget guy this morning, but he didn't seem all too thrilled with that. Plus, we can't feed the rumor mill more than we already do. If we're trying to keep this marriage thing to ourselves, the Bureau is going to have to keep springing for separate rooms for no reason."

Scully turned somber. "Why is this happening to me, Mulder?" She sounded more afraid than he'd heard her in a long time, not since…

"You don't think it's the cancer coming back, do you?" His voice trembled.

"I don't know, Mulder. I really don't." She sighed, closing her eyes.

"Does your head hurt?"

She nodded wordlessly. He massaged her temples with his fingers, applying just the right amount of pressure. "That feel okay?"

"Yeah."

"Do you remember the last time I did this?"

 _It was the night before her cancer went into remission. She'd never been in so much pain in her life, and just when she thought it couldn't get any more unbearable, the pressure in her head increased to a fevered pitch. She couldn't sleep because the pain was so horrible._

 _Mulder had come into her room way past visiting hours but she didn't complain. They didn't have much time left to fool with rules. He had known instantly that something was wrong; more wrong than usual. He had wordlessly climbed into bed behind her and massaged her temples. She could have cried in relief as the pressure dissipated._

 _That day, her head had hurt so much that she almost wished it would just go ahead and explode to relieve the pressure. Her vision had blacked out for a few minutes at a time, causing her to panic, and she'd had three nosebleeds that day alone. It was the worst day of the pain, and somehow he knew exactly what she needed._

 _That's when she knew he loved her; because he'd cared for her without her even having to ask him. He just stepped in and cared for her._

"I do. That's when I knew you loved me."

"It took you that long to realize? I thought I was being fairly obvious for a long time before then."

"I'm sure you were, I was just too scared to admit it."

"We're going home first thing in the morning. You're sick and you need to rest. You can't do that here."

"Mulder-"

He kissed the back of her neck. "Shh, Scully. You need to take care of yourself. Until we figure out what's wrong, no more FBI business for you. And when we get home you're going straight to the doctor."

She groaned. "It's probably just a bug, Mulder. No reason to make a fuss."

"It's never _just_ anything with us, Scully. Better safe than sorry. Now go to sleep."


	22. Chapter 22

The Lone Gunmen poked their heads into Scully's room.

"Come on in, guys," she said, sounding resigned.

Frohike spoke up. "I'm really sorry, Scully."

She nodded. "Thanks, Frohike."

"Is everything alright with the baby?" Byers asked quietly.

"Yes. They just did an ultrasound. Everything's fine."

"Congratulations, by the way. How are you feeling?" Langly cut in.

"I think I'm still in shock, if I'm being honest."

"Forgive me if this is too forward, but I was under the impression that you weren't… able to conceive."

"I wasn't." She said flatly. "Byers, did Mulder tell you guys that we were trying?"

He shook his head. "Even if he had, it's none of our business."

"Right after we got married, we, um, we tried a round of in-vitro fertilization using one of the ova that Mulder recovered during my cancer. It didn't take."

All three Gunmen were stunned into silence.

"I'm so sorry."

"No, it's okay. I think we've made our peace with it. It just sucks that he's not here right now. I will never forget the look on his face when I told him it had failed. He was so devastated. And to not be able to give him this news and see his face now… I wish he was here."

"We're going to find him. Assistant Director Skinner said he would get a search party together right away. He's headed back to the Bureau now. Everything's going to be okay, Scully." Byers patted her hand gently.

Much to both of their surprise, Scully pulled Byers into a tight hug and buried her face in his shoulder. He awkwardly patted her back as she sobbed against him.

"I can't do this alone. I can't do this without Mulder, I'm not strong enough."

He pulled back, handing her a tissue. "You're not going to be alone. We will be here for whatever you need. We'll help you shop, we can drive you to appointments if you need, we'll cover costs if money is tight…"

"Thank you, Byers."


	23. Chapter 23

"Anybody miss me?" He joked, trying to lighten the mood, maybe make her smile if he was lucky.

She smiled weakly. "We both did."

His eyebrows furrowed. "Both?"

She took a deep breath, trying to keep the grin from taking over her face. "Mulder, I'm pregnant."

His eyes widened as she guided his hand to her stomach. How had he not noticed the swell before? He inhaled sharply as the baby moved beneath his palm. "How far along are you?"

"About seven months, give or take."

"I'm happy for you, Scully." He placed a hand on her knee, stroking with his thumb, but he didn't look happy.

"Mulder, it's _yours._ " She squeezed his hand, causing him to look her in the eyes.

"What?"

"Did you think this," she gestured to her rings, "meant nothing to me? I wore them the whole time you were gone. I think Agent Doggett is very confused, but I didn't think he needed to know. Skinner's having a field day watching people chase their tails and trying to figure out what it all means."

He looked incredulous. "But how? I thought the doctors said…"

"I guess it's a miracle." She beamed softly.

"Maybe I believe in miracles after all." He rubbed her belly and the baby responded, kicking his hand. He grinned, then winced as the wounds on his face protested.

She stroked his face gently.

"But, Scully?"

"Yes?"

"We need a bigger house."

Scully kissed him gently. "You need to rest. Go to sleep, I'll be right here."


	24. Chapter 24

"I like that one," she pointed to the light brown kitchen table across the showing area. He followed her gaze.

He nodded. "It's nice…"

"But." She sighed.

"No, I really do like that one. Really. But maybe we should look into getting some wicker furniture."

"Mulder, do you even know what wicker is?"

He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "Well, um, no, but…"

"Then no wicker. Okay, are we agreed on this set for the living room?"

He nodded. "Sure. But can I pick out the bedside tables?"

She huffed. "This is supposed to be a team effort, Mulder."

"Then why are you doing all the work?"

She sighed. "Can we go ahead and finish up here? I'm exhausted." She rubbed her growing belly.

His tone changed immediately. "Of course. Okay, what else do we need?"

She consulted her list. "Kitchen and living room are done, bedroom is almost done, and we still need bookshelves for your office."

"What do you say we call it a day and come back another time? We've got everything we need. I think we can survive without bedside tables for a few days, don't you?"

She nodded in acquiescence. "Thank you." She squeezed his hand gratefully.

"Let's get you home."


	25. Chapter 25

"Mulder!" Scully giggled as he poked her nose with the paintbrush, leaving a sloppy splotch of white paint behind.

She swiped at him in retaliation as he tried to swat her hand away. But she was too fast for him, and he wound up with a white streak across his face.

He smiled mischievously, distracting her long enough for him to paint a smiley face over her growing belly. She looked down and grinned goofily. "Mulder, how much paint has actually made it onto the house?"

He looked himself over. "Well, not much, that's for sure."

"Okay, we have to at least finish this side of the house today. Deal?"

He reached out to shake her hand, but when she pulled away, her hand was coated in white paint. "No fair!" She cried indignantly, running after him as he rounded the back corner of the house.

"You'll never catch me!" He called gleefully over his shoulder.

She sputtered to a stop, panting. Mulder was nowhere in sight. "Mulder?"

She felt his arms snake around her. "Surprise." He snuck a kiss on her temple.

"We're never going to finish painting the house," she sighed, but kissed him back, this time full on the mouth.


	26. Chapter 26

They had been staying in a hotel in Georgia for over a week now waiting for the baby to make an appearance, and both Mulder and Scully were becoming increasingly cranky in confined quarters. They had agreed that it would be good to be close to the safehouse in case her labor progressed faster than was usual, but Scully was miserable. Her feet hurt and she felt like an elephant. Mulder had been nothing but understanding and gentle with her, but she was sick and tired of this 20 by 20 foot room.

He had gone to grab a pizza for the two of them to share, but the instant he walked in the door to the hotel room, he knew something was different.

Scully reached for Mulder's shoulder, bracing herself. She sucked in a breath. "Mulder?"

He looked down at her, panicked. "Is it time?"

She nodded, wincing as a contraction ripped through her body and she tightened her grip on Mulder.

"Okay, don't panic. We're going to walk to the car. Can you do that with me? I'll grab your bag. Hang on just a second, okay?" He abandoned the pizza box on the hotel room floor at his feet.

"Okay," she breathed.

He snagged the overnight bag from the hotel bed, and was back at her side in a flash. He let her lean on him as they made their way to the car.

* * *

He drove as she kept a firm hold on his hand across the center console. "Okay, the safehouse is only a mile away now. Can you hold on for another minute?"

She nodded, unable to speak. He gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. He breathed a sigh of relief as they pulled up to the small house where Monica Reyes was waiting, always reliable. They were safe now.

They slowly walked up to the house, pausing a couple times for Scully to try to breathe through a contraction while Mulder rubbed her back. Between the two of them, they eventually got Scully settled on a bed inside and as comfortable as possible.

* * *

Mulder sat behind her, offering quiet and solid support. He patiently wiped the sweat off of her forehead over and over as she tried to rest against him before labor sped up. He massaged her temples to help her calm down and told her stories from when he was little to give her something else to focus on. He helped her drink some water.

Before long, Scully sat rigid, looking panicked. "Mulder, they're getting closer together. It won't be much longer."

He swept a strand of sweaty hair off of her face. "It's going to be okay. You're doing great, Dana. Just keep breathing through the contractions, remember what they taught us at Lamaze? In for two, out for four. I'll breathe with you. Good job."

He rubbed her back, trying to ease some of the tension. "Try to relax your back, okay? I know it hurts."

She winced.

"Sore spot?"

"I think I may have pulled something."

"I'll be careful."

"I'd kill for some painkillers right about now." Her voice broke, betraying the amount of pain she was truly in.

"I'm so sorry, sweetheart. I wish we could do this in a hospital where you could be comfortable. But you're so strong. You're doing great. We're almost there, okay? Just a little while longer."

Monica sat at the foot of the bed, watching quietly.

Scully heaved forward, and Mulder rushed to push her shoulders back on the pillows, but she resisted. "Mulder, this is it." Her eyes widened, terrified.

Her hands found Mulder's and she held onto him for all she was worth.

Monica sprang into action. "Okay, it's time to push, Dana. You can do this, okay?"

Scully nodded, gritting her teeth.

Mulder tightened his hold on her hand, silently offering support.

* * *

She screamed. He'd heard her scream before, but never like this. He'd never felt so helpless to help her. He had always been able to see practical ways to help her, and yet here he was, watching her have to fight this battle alone.

He rubbed her arms, trying to be comforting. "You're doing great, sweetheart, you're almost there. Keep going."

She pushed several times, then fell back against him, breathing erratically.

Her eyes grew wild. "Mulder, I can't breathe." She panicked.

He squeezed her hand. "Okay, breathe with me. In for two through your nose, out for four through your mouth. Good job. Let's do it two more times, okay? And then we're going to push again."

"Mulder, I can't do this. I'm not strong enough." She whimpered.

"Scully, look at me." He tilted her chin. "You are the strongest person I know. If anyone can do this, it's you. Now come on, you've got to do this."

"This is so much more painful than I thought it would be."

"You're doing great. You've been at this for fourteen hours. You're almost done, okay? Now let's do this."

She pushed several more times, and finally...a cry. She fell back against his chest, exhausted.

Mulder gasped, grinning disbelievingly. Monica placed the baby on Scully's chest, hurriedly mopping him up and wrapping him in a blanket. "Congratulations. It's a boy."

Monica stood in the corner, speaking quietly on the phone to the paramedics.

A tear escaped his eye and he wiped it away hurriedly. "Scully, you did it. You were amazing. He's here, he's finally here. Scully, we're parents."

She smiled weakly. "We sure are."

He kissed her temple.

She couldn't stop staring at him. "He's so beautiful, Mulder."

"He takes after his mother."

She breathed a laugh, playing with the baby's tiny, doll-like fingers. His fingers found Mulder's and latched on. He just stared in wonder.

"I can't believe he's real."

Scully kissed his cheek. "He's real."

"I'm a dad."

"You sure are." She beamed, wiping away a tear. "I thought this was never going to happen for us."

He gave her hand a squeeze. "I know. But he's here now and he's so perfect."

Monica cut in. "The paramedics are going to have to airlift you to the hospital, okay? They're sending a chopper now."

Scully gripped her hand gently. "Thank you, Monica. For everything."

* * *

The three of them sat in silence and awe, just watching the baby until the sound of a helicopter outside became deafening and two paramedics, a man and a woman, ran in with a stretcher.

Mulder rattled off Scully's medical information from memory, holding Scully closer as the paramedics did a cursory examination. One of them held up the umbilical cord.

"Dad? You want to cut the cord?"

Mulder's eyes widened. Scully squeezed his hand. "Go ahead, Mulder."

The female paramedic handed him the scissors and showed him where to cut.

"Perfect, Mulder." Scully encouraged him.

"Ms. Scully, you've lost a lot of blood. We need to get you to a hospital right away. Let's get her on the stretcher." She motioned to Mulder.

"Scully, we're going to have to pick you up, okay?"

She nodded, wincing.

"I know you're in a lot of pain, but I'll try to be gentle. You can squeeze my hand if you need to, okay?"

"Thank you."

Mulder scooped her up, the female paramedic supporting her feet and the male following close behind with the baby. She grimaced and buried her face in the space between his shoulder and his neck, whimpering quietly.

He held her close. "I know it hurts, I'm trying to hurry."

They set Scully down on the stretcher as carefully as possible, but she still cried out.

He brushed her hair off of her sweaty forehead, doing his best to comfort. "I'm sorry, sweetheart. It's going to be okay, we'll get to the hospital and then you can sleep. But not yet, okay?"

She nodded, exhausted. "I think I tore. They'll need to stitch me up and deliver the placenta. And with the amount of blood I've lost, I'm going to be in the hospital for a couple days at least."

He sighed. "I know. We'll be alright."

He held her hand throughout the ride, silently offering support as the paramedics continued to check her and the baby out as well as they could. When they got to the hospital, they carted the baby off to get his first checkup and shots while they delivered the placenta. Scully panicked, shouting at the nurses not to take him, that he was her baby. Mulder pushed her shoulders back onto the bed.

"Relax. I'll go with them. We'll be back before you know it." He kissed her forehead.

* * *

After they delivered the placenta, Mulder carried the baby back into the hospital room to feed for the first time. He and Scully watched in awe as the baby ate and Mulder tried not to cry from sheer relief that everything was okay, against all odds. They placed the baby in the bassinet next to her bed while Scully got checked out.

Scully was right. The doctors looked her over, determining that she had, in fact, torn rather severely during delivery and would need stitches. She had also lost a lot of blood, likely due to the tear, so she was stuck on bedrest for the time being. Not that she was complaining.

* * *

She fell asleep as soon as the doctors left and slept for six hours straight before the nurse came in with William, stating that he needed to be fed again. She obliged, then fell asleep for who-knows-how long. When she woke up again, Mulder was by her side, waving a plastic bag.

"Three guesses what I brought you."

"Chinese?"

"You truly are my soulmate, Scully."


End file.
